"Mostly, every person wants to be the best version of themselves they can be." We have an innate desire to improve, so why do so many people settle for being just okay? Why do we assume we can't improve, or that we are tapped out? Over these next few blogs, we will discuss some practical steps everyone can take to get out of the "okay" rut. These are steps you can take, starting today. I hope that after this series you are making strides toward being the man/woman God made you to be. Just like Pearl Jam's song a few decades ago, "A Better Man". STEP 1: Identify the LIES Growing up my grandfather used to tell us that if you sprinkled salt on a squirrel's tail you could catch it. Or have you ever been Snipe hunting? :) You know, they are both not true. I have tried! If you are like me, you believe certain things about yourself that just are not true. As I grew up, I learned to bury truth in grandeur, by being egregious with success or portrayed as something other than the truth, in order to gain influence, material gains, etc. That was one lie that I believed. What have you believed and unknowingly accepted? It could be that you are incapable of losing wight, you aren't smart enough, you will never find a significant other, or you cannot be minister of the gospel. Like Moses, Jonah, and many more from the Bible, God's plan or blueprint to becoming the best version of yourself is not available, need access code, etc. Whatever the lie is, you don't have to keep believing it. The problem is that we don't always seem to know when we are believing a lie. A lot of times, it is something that we have just accepted subconsciously. How do we start identifying these lies and calling them what they are? How do we start unmasking the deep rooted lies that we have accepted as truth? First, we have to allow God to identify the lies from truth: To "capture rebellious thought." We need to ask God to give us insight or clarity, into what He says is true. Ask him who He created you to be. Ask for discernment, to be filled with the Holy Spirit to guide you through this process, rebuke Satan, and lastly, ask your friends and family for their view of you. Flesh out the very things you have always believed and confirm whether or not they are true. Second, replace the lies with truth. This is what it means to "teach your thoughts to obey Christ." Confirm what is true. Speak the truth out loud. Set up ways to be affirmed in truth and to be accountable to others when they see you not walking in truth. It could mean seeing a counselor. It could mean writing down lies you have believed, then lining them up against scripture. Third, create opportunities to watch the truth play out in front of you. Maybe it is finding ways to measure your success. Maybe it is hitting the gym and watching the pounds drop off. Maybe it is getting involved with a singles group, Sunday school class, or other organization to assist others. Whatever it is, experiencing the joy of watching the lie die, while seeing truth manifested through faith growing your confidence and need to share with others. Today is the day you stop believing the lies and start experiencing the Truth. Don't be just "okay", be a better man/woman. 1. Allow God to separate the lies you have believes from His truth. 2. Replace lies with the truth. Write down the lies, then check them against what Scripture says. 3. Create opportunities to watch the truth play out, so you can share your success with others. 2 Corinthians 10:5 - "Casting down the imaginations, and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ." Psalms 86:11 - "Teach me thy way, O Lord, and I will walk in thy truth: knit mine heart to the, that I may fear the Name." John 8:44 - "You are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father you will do: he has been a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. We he speaks a lie, then he speaks of his own: for he is the father of lies."

Worry is where we mull over, ponder, and think of a negative outcome until it causes stress, anxiety, dread, and ultimately fear. We usually see things turning out very badly, and imagine the worst case scenario. We can't see that anything will get any better, only worse. What we know about the soul is whatever we continue to think about things, it affects our emotions. And so anxiety, stress, and fear begin to take over and dominate us. From this point we start to make decisions based on all this negative thinking because this is how we feel. We can tend to withdraw, avoid, shrink back, or try to work things out in our own strength. But Jesus Christ says "Do Not Worry?" The reason Jesus said for us not to worry is because of who our Father is. He created everything by His word, He created us, and He is all love, all power, all knowing. So if we are believers, then we are also sons and daughters of God. We have full access to all his help, wisdom, power, which dwells in us right now. If He is already in your heart, then everything you need is on the inside of you by the Holy Spirit. So then, the battle is in our minds, our imaginations, and this is where worry begins. What are we allowing in our minds? What are we allowing our imaginations to see? We have got to be intentional on what we think on. This is why Jesus Christ, in his Sermon on the Mount, says "don't be like those who don't know God". Don't go down the wrong path to get things in your own strength, stressing and worrying. But seek God, seek His kingdom ways, seek His promises, seek His word in your situation. Think on these things, look at these things in your thoughts and imaginations. Where you are looking is key. Whatever you put your attention on is the direction you will head in. Faith in God and His Word, and always looking at His words, your eyes on Him. We know when we are worrying and anxious, we have taken our attention away from God and His Kingdom ways and put them back on our own abilities and strength. But 2 Peter 1 says - "We have already been given all we need for life and godliness through the promises of God. This is not easy, as there are plenty of things going to tell you it's not true." So what kingdom are you operating in today? Where are you looking today? The Kingdom of God - operates by faith and trust in God's ways, God's word. All the other kingdoms of the world operate in stress, fear, worry, and anxiety. Jesus came to deliver us from all of this, by showing us a different way to lie in His kingdom. So I ask you, which kingdom do you want to live in today? In Matthew, chapter 6, Jesus gives us a road map on how to navigate this kingdom and not to lean on our own ideas, or notions, or motives. We need to die to selfishness, submit ourselves daily to God's purpose and plans for our lives, and allow the Holy Spirit to guide us down the path of righteousness. This is a remedy to eliminate the fears out and away from our lives. Read the chapter below and keep it close to your heart and mind. Be well... Matthew Chapter 6: 1 Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. 2 Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 3 But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: 4 That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly. 5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are : for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. 7 But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do : for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. 8 Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him. 9 After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. 10 Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. 11 Give us this day our daily bread. 12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. 13 And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen. 14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: 15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. 16 Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 17 But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face; 18 That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly. 19 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: 20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: 21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. 22 The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light. 23 But if thine eye be evil, thy whole body shall be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in thee be darkness, how great is that darkness! 24 No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon. 25 Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? 26 Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? 27 Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? 28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: 29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? 31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. 34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

If you look at the ancient buildings and archaeological findings in Israel, you will notice that the symbol of the menorah appears time and time again. For millennia, it was the symbol of the people of Israel, long before the Star of David. But historians don’t really know why this symbol rather than any other. Perhaps the New Covenant has some answers? What is the meaning of the menorah? The menorah has always been God’s idea. It first appears in Exodus chapter 25, as God instructs them how to make it: “You are to make a menorah of pure gold. It is to be made of hammered work; its base, shaft, cups, ring of outer leaves and petals are to be of one piece with it. It is to have six branches extending from its sides, three branches of the menorah on one side of it and three on the other. On one branch are to be three cups shaped like almond blossoms, each with a ring of outer leaves and petals; likewise on the opposite branch three cups shaped like almond blossoms, each with a ring of outer leaves and petals; and similarly for all six branches extending from the menorah… Make seven lamps for the menorah, and mount them so as to give light to the space in front of it.” (verses 31-37, Complete Jewish Bible) When we see the instructions that God gives to Moses on how precisely to build the tabernacle, we are struck by the incredible amount of detail involved. Every tiny detail has been considered to perfection. It might seem strange to our ears sometimes, but if we are willing to “seek diligently” as the two central words of the Torah say, then we can find some wonderful truths hidden in God’s law. The book of Hebrews gives us some help on our quest, reminding us in chapter 8 that all the items God told Moses to make “serve as a copy and shadow of the heavenly things.” “…For when Moses was about to erect the tent, he was instructed by God, saying, “See that you make everything according to the pattern that was shown you on the mountain.” But as it is, the Messiah has obtained a ministry that is as much more excellent than the old as the covenant he mediates is better, since it is enacted on better promises.” Hebrews 8:5-6 By studying the tabernacle with all its details, we can learn about heavenly things. They are a shadow, a pattern of what was to come in the Messiah. But let’s look at the original lampstand commissioned by God. Solid gold, with seven stands but made of one piece, and adorned with almond blossoms… The Menorah spreads Light First of all, the light given by the massive menorah in the dark tent would have been a powerful symbol of God’s light and holiness in our dark and sinful world. Jewish tradition holds that it reminds the people of Israel that they are also called to be his “Light to the nations” as God prescribed in Isaiah 42:6. Gently spreading light without force – “Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the LORD” , in Zechariah 4:6, when the prophet asks about the menorah. It’s a symbol of bringing God’s glory, truth, and light into the world. And his people are called to be his representatives in bringing that light too. Jesus teaches in Matthew 5 that we too are called to be that light to the world: “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” The light is a witness to and of God. In John 8, we see Jesus speaking in the temple, declaring, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” The Pharisees challenged him, “Here you are, appearing as your own witness; your testimony is not valid.” Verse 20 tells us that: “He spoke these words while teaching in the temple courts near the place where the offerings were put.” He was standing close to the huge temple menorah, declaring himself to be that ultimate light and witness, as indeed he is. The menorah was a shadow of the coming Messiah, and his chosen witnesses to the world: the body of believers. The Seven branches the Menorah As we know, seven is God’s number of completion, but despite the plurality of lamps, it is made of one ‘piece’. Seven in one, like a rainbow, or a week. We know that it is to represent the presence of God among in the midst of them, and in Revelation we also see the lampstands representing the Spirit’s presence in the churches to whom John writes the messages from Yeshua. There are seven churches listed, but one bride of Yeshua. The other aspect of the seven branches design is that it resembles a tree. In Jewish tradition, the menorah is reminiscent of the Tree of Life from the creation story. We can see from the New Testament in the book of Revelation that the tree is equated with eternal life. Adam and Eve were banished from it, and Revelation 22 tells us that those with clean robes have the right to eat from it. Thus, the menorah speaks of eternal life with God for his bride, made available to us all, only through the blood of the Messiah. Jesus said “I am the true vine, you are the branches” in John 15. He is the tree, and only in him can we live spiritually and produce fruit. Almond blossom And why almond blossoms on the menorah? Every detail is significant with God, and no word is wasted. Almond trees are mentioned elsewhere in the Bible in significant ways – the first time was when Aaron’s priestly authority was questioned, and his staff budded, bloomed and produced fruit overnight as validation from God. The second is when God shows Jeremiah an almond branch in a vision. God uses a Hebrew word-play, as the word for ‘almond’ is also root of the word to be ‘diligent and hard-working’, because the tree blooms and produces fruit before any other tree – in the middle of winter. It is a metaphor for haste and determined work. God assures Jeremiah that he is diligently watching over his word to fulfill it, in Jeremiah 1:12, and so almond blossoms are a symbol of God’s determination to carry out his plans. In Zechariah 4, we see the prophet bewildered by a vision of a menorah with two olive trees either side, providing oil for the lamps. Again, if we turn to the New Testament to look for two olive trees, we hear Paul describing Jews and Gentiles in Romans 11 as two olive trees; the wild Gentile tree being grafted into the cultivated Jewish tree, through Jesus. The two become one in him: “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility by abolishing the law of commandments expressed in ordinances, that he might create in himself one new man in place of the two, so making peace, and might reconcile us both to God in one body through the cross, thereby killing the hostility. And he came and preached peace to you who were far off and peace to those who were near. For through him we both have access in one Spirit to the Father. So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit. ” (Ephesians 2:13-22) The items in the desert tabernacle spoke of what was to come in the New Covenant – one bride of Messiah: Jew and Gentile called together, brought purified and clean before God to dwell with him. What a powerful symbol, and what riches are spoken by the God-designed menorah. How wonderful it is to have been brought into the New Covenant, and that we can see the fulfillment in Jesus , the One to whom the menorah points. As Christians, or followers of Jesus Christ, it is important to understand things like this from the Word of God. Maybe we all should spend more time in this amazing gift. Be well... Golden Menorah

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." What does Jesus mean when he talks about blessings? The word Blessed in Greek is Makarios , and it's difficult to translate into English. Many translators used the word Blessed or Happy as the meaning they could get. There is an eternal Joy on the inside that the world cannot give you. This means no matter what happens in my day, I have a joy that cannot be taken away. These Beatitudes re an invitation into a completely counter-cultural value system that no circumstance or happening can take our Joy away. It's by living with these new instructions that Jesus gives, that he is inviting us to live a truly flourishing life. The first group that Jesus says is blessed are the poor in spirit. What does He mean to be poor in spirit? In the book of Matthew, chapter 5, verse 3, the word that is used in the original New Testament Greek is a word that means "poverty, to cower, to cringe like a beggar". In classical Greek usage, it was used the same way, as someone who crouches, who bends, who wretchedly begs for money or for worth. And if you take this meaning of the word and you combine it with "in spirit", you get "poverty in spirit". What it is saying is: those who are poor in spirit are those who are blessed, are those who will have the kingdom of heaven. You could translate it like this, "Blessed are those who are so desperately poor in their spiritual resources that they realize that they must have help from outside sources. Theirs is the kingdom of heaven" . Matthew 5:3-20 : "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are they which hunger and thirst for righteousness: for they shall be filled. Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Blessed are they which suffer persecution for righteousness sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed shall you be when men revile you, and persecute you, and say all manner of evil against you for My sake, falsely. Rejoice and be glad, for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the Prophets which were before you. You are the salt of the earth: but if the salt has lost its savor, wherewith shall it be salted? It is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to trodden under the foot of men. You re the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill, cannot be hidden. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick, and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father, which is in Heaven. Think not that I come to destroy the Law, or the Prophets. I am not come to destroy them, but to fulfill them. For truly I say unto you, Till Heaven, and earth perish, one iota or title of the Law shall not escape, till all things be fulfilled. Whosoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and teach men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven: but whosoever shall observe and teach them, the same shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven. For I say unto you, except your righteousness exceed the righteousness of the Scribes and Pharisees, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven." So I ask you, where are you today? What is your heart yearning for? Do you know someone that needs guidance or assistance of any kind? Maybe by listening to others and sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ, we can help ourselves, along with helping others come to know Him. The Sermon on the Mount is an awesome tool or resource on how we as Christians, or followers of Jesus Christ, should live our daily lives and interact with others. I would encourage you to open up the Word of God and read over those passages and refresh your mind and spirit. We all have the ability to strive for righteousness and be the salt and the light that can lead others to find that JOY or the PEACE that passes all understanding. But we have to come to know it within ourselves first, then help others find their way in this dark world. I hope you have found this useful and inspiring. Until next time. .. Be well... Sermon on the Mount

After six weeks in Florida recently, I was able to meet and assist several people throughout the state affected by the most recent storms. The emotional range was all over the map, ranging from anger to hopelessness, and fear. Florida is a beautiful place and full of rich multicultural environments, that feed the daily lives of millions of Floridians. Some are there for work, some are there for escaping the cold weather from up north, and some were born there and just have not left what they call paradise. There is an element of tropical landscape that can draw in even the most meager personalities and get you swept up into an emotional tornado regarding even the most mundane thoughts. I did encounter lots of Gratitude from all types of people while I was there for work regarding recovery efforts. I am very thankful to have been able to work in Florida and meet some wonderful personalities and will consider vacationing there in the future. The Law of Divine Oneness , states that we are all interconnected through our creation, by the creator, (God), in other words what or whoever created you, created me, using the same materials. We all have different lives or independence to make choices daily, but we need to understand that all choices affect your personal environment and others you surround yourself with. I am a Christian, a follower of Jesus Christ, and can rely on the power and access of the Holy Spirit to help guide me through understanding that all of this is provided to us from God the Father. This is considered an extreme lifestyle by most of this world and not practical or logical. This is because we live in a society that promotes escapism and self manifestation. This world teaches that we can not fail at passive activities and we can manifest the things you want all by yourself. I don't support these theories, because I believe that there is both good and evil, so something is driving or assisting these outcomes. We are not alone and we have to make our own choice to create change within our own lives. When you understand that you have the power to create change where it is needed, embrace what is working, and this will create a positive intention or ripple of positive energy throughout your immediate environment. You can do this by injecting positive words , out loud, to align your energy to positively charged thoughts. Words are energized, so use them to build up, promote, support, encourage, to show Gratitude , and to love. In order for you to do this outwardly towards others, you have to pay attention to your own inner dialogue and keep it in check. You can do this by starting with complimenting yourself daily. Compliments are the gifts of prosperity and the language of abundance. This creates a positive mindset within you first, then to overflow your positivity into others. Joy is cultivated by a consistent practice of Gratitude . We must strive daily to achieve an Attitude of Gratitude . Here are 5 things you can start with daily to help integrate into various parts of your daily routine. 1. First thought of the day and the last thought/emotion of the day. This effects so much and if you get these right, then your days and sleep cycle will always benefit you positively. 2. Look for simple details to be Grateful for. I am sure that you have heard, "that its all about the little things," and "that the KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid) theory is the best." 3. Slow down and make space. Make sure you are investing the necessary time to keep your own personal thoughts and emotions in check. We can't expel positivity if we don't have it on the inside. Meditation, prayer, and reading the Word of God, is the best recipe, that I have found. 4. Start a new hobby or passion. Sometimes we need to restart with something new, and revitalize our inner being. Just remember, there is nothing more contagious than NEW positive excitement, except negative "stuck-in a rut" energy. Remember that negative emotions that are ignored become negative stuck energy in the body. 5. Be Mindful - ALWAYS!!! Please understand that you need to know where you are emotionally, before ever assisting others. Sometimes its best to say nothing, just LISTEN . I hope you have found this blog inspiring and helpful. Please be mindful of yourself and others Always!! Find your Attitude of Gratitude today... Be Well...

I have started to realize that as humans, we only learn from our failures. To be honest, that statement really discourages a lot of people from even making an attempt at anything, due to their fear of failure. We live in a world that constantly tells us that success only happens when you score the most points, or make the highest number of sales, or even if you make the most money. I disagree. Success, comes in many forms. In fact, it can only come from previous failures or you would not even call it a success, due to there would be no way to tell the difference. I might be just stating the obvious, but I think it is time we start looking at failure right in its face and say, "I understand that I missed the mark, but I will have no fear to keep on moving forward." Too many of us just quit after a few try's and think that it was not meant to be, or this is not my thing. When clearly we have fear of change. We ask ourselves: Maybe it is us? Maybe we should ask for assistance? Maybe we should just give up? Move on...? Like in the Star Wars and Dune movies - "Fear is the mind killer, I must not fear." "Fear is the path to the Dark side, Fear leads to Anger, Anger leads to Hate, Hate leads to Suffering." Any phycologist will tell you the same thing. There are multiple quotes in a book inspired by the Word of God made flesh (aka Jesus Christ), that give us a way to change or renew our minds, hearts, and thoughts. We must be willing to change the way we look at things like failures while in the valley of despair and how we deal with the emotions that follow. More to come, but do be afraid of change and have no fear in the valley's, someone is always there with you. All you have to do is change your reactions by submitting to Gods will and follow the path of righteousness. Be well...

The Idea of Active Listening Active listening is often described as a practice in effective communication. But it’s far more than that. It’s a leadership strategy. Simply put, we need to be interested before we are interesting. It’s a nearly 100-year-old concept first written about by Dale Carnegie in How to Win Friends and Influence People . But, I would argue it’s more important now than it’s ever been, especially with young people. On another note, it also allows you to see things that might not be said, allowing to foster an environment of trust and mutual respect. “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People Research Insight: Techniques and Strategies The study, “Techniques and Strategies to Develop Active Listening Skills: The Armor for Effective Communication across Business Organizations” by P. Khanna (2020) emphasizes the critical role of active listening. It’s presented as a vital soft skill that is often overlooked in professional settings but is crucial for building trust, establishing rapport, and enhancing problem-solving capabilities within teams. This week, we are going to highlight the strategies they researched within teams that enhanced leaders’ and teams’ active listening: So, what does this research suggest? Empathy and Attention: Active listening demands empathy towards the speaker and paying full attention to their words. This involves being fully present in the conversation, without distractions, and seeking to understand the speaker’s perspective. Mindful Listening: The paper stresses the importance of mindful listening, which entails listening with the intent to understand rather than to reply. This approach helps in acknowledging the speaker’s viewpoint and encourages a more constructive dialogue. Feedback and Paraphrasing: Providing feedback through paraphrasing what has been heard is a technique to ensure understanding. It clarifies misinterpretations and demonstrates to the speaker that their message is being actively processed. Non-Verbal Cues: Recognizing and responding to non-verbal cues includes maintaining eye contact, nodding, and other gestures that indicate engagement and understanding. Questioning: Ask open-ended questions that encourage the speaker to elaborate on their points. This fosters open communication. Avoid Interruption: Do not interrupt the speaker. It seems simple, but so many people interrupt speakers when “listening”. Give them time to complete their thoughts, even rest in silence for a second to make sure they’re done speaking Practice and Conscious Effort: Developing active listening skills requires practice and a conscious effort to implement these strategies in daily communication. Regular reflection on one’s listening habits and seeking feedback will help you! Conclusion : Active listening is a cornerstone to develop effective 21st-century leadership, particularly in high-pressure situations, and especially with young people. By truly listening to what your team members say, leaders and members can build trust, uncover underlying/never spoken about issues, and eventually drive their teams to greater success. It happens from more than just hearing words; it’s about understanding the full message, to include the emotional drivers behind it, and the unspoken cues or motivators. Implementing active listening strategies can revolutionize the way leaders interact with their teams, leading to improved performance, enhanced team dynamics, and a culture of mutual respect and understanding, that will allow your teams to reach higher goals and set higher self achievement standards. Just remember, there is no I, in team... Be Well...

In life, our empathy and compassion are among our greatest strengths. They allow us to connect with others, offer support, and build meaningful relationships. However, it's essential to be discerning about where we direct our sympathy. The quote, "Be careful who you feel sorry for... Some people are good at lying and playing the victim," serves as a poignant reminder of this need for discernment. Some individuals have mastered the art of deception, presenting themselves as victims to manipulate others. They may weave intricate tales of hardship and injustice, eliciting sympathy and support from those around them. This behavior can stem from various motivations, including a desire for attention, control, or avoidance of responsibility. Identifying those who play the victim can be challenging, but there are telltale signs. These individuals often refuse to take responsibility for their actions, instead blaming others for their misfortunes. They may also exhibit a pattern of seeking sympathy while making little effort to change their circumstances. Understanding these behaviors can help us protect our emotional well-being and ensure our compassion is directed towards those who genuinely need it. When we extend our sympathy to those who manipulate us, we inadvertently take away from those who truly need our support. Genuine victims of hardship, abuse, or misfortune may be overlooked or dismissed because of the actions of those who falsely claim victimhood. It's crucial to remain vigilant and ensure our empathy reaches those who genuinely deserve it. Balancing compassion with discernment doesn't mean becoming cynical or distrusting. Instead, it involves being mindful and observant. Ask yourself whether the person in question is taking steps to improve their situation or if they consistently rely on others to solve their problems. Genuine victims often show resilience and a desire to overcome their challenges, even if they need support along the way. By being careful about who we feel sorry for, we can better empower true victims. Offering support to those who genuinely need it can make a significant difference in their lives. It can provide them with the strength and resources to overcome their challenges and build a better future. In conclusion, while our empathy is a powerful tool for good, it's essential to wield it wisely. By recognizing the signs of those who play the victim and directing our compassion towards genuine victims, we can make a more meaningful and positive impact. Remember, being careful about who you feel sorry for isn't about withholding compassion; it's about ensuring that our support reaches those who truly need it. Stay compassionate, stay discerning, and continue to make a difference in the lives of those who genuinely need your support. If you like what you see, we have all types of programs for All ages and backgrounds! Check out our website and discover All we have to offer. www.for-the-father.com Be Well... Aric D. Cunningham - aka 81 Dragonfly

In todays world, we are all caught up with wanting to not only individually grow, but to maximize our relationship satisfaction. I am sure we all remember sayings like: "You get back what you put in." or "You get what you give." Well, I am here to tell you that after 30 years of marriage, you have to continually work on yourself more than your spouse. I recently read an article about this topic and it led me to write this blog. It was directed towards what women should be giving to their spouse. I wanted to bring this to you as both parties should be doing the 10 items coherently. Not just the one sided. Granted, I don't always get things right and I can admit that, but here we go!!! 1. The Room To Chase - Your spouse desires the room to chase their own dreams & inspirations. This reflects a partners trust and belief in their capabilities. 2. Variety - This involves embracing spontaneity, trying new experiences, and keeping things interesting. 3. RESPECT - This involves valuing your spouses opinions, acknowledging their strengths, and treating them as an equal partner. This builds a very strong relationship, but this also requires knowing your place in the relationship and respecting yourself first. 4. Your TRUST - This signifies belief in your spouses character, decisions, and their loyalty. This creates a sense of security, intimacy, and emotional connection. This builds mutual trust as you "Get what you Give." 4.1. Space - Respecting each others need for independence, hobbies, and personal time. This shows trust & appreciation for individuality. 5. & 6. Compliments & Appreciation - Genuine praise for their efforts, achievements, and qualities. This boosts confidence, strengthens emotional connect, and shows that you value their contributions. 7. Initiation - This involves taking the lead in planning dates, initiating conversations, and expressing affection. This builds respect and strengthens the emotional bond between you and your spouse. 8. A BUDDY - This is not just a romantic partner, but also a Friend. Sharing laughter, crying together, hobbies, and supporting each others goals. This builds a strong emotional support system. 9. Acceptance of your spouses help - This signifies trust & appreciation for their efforts, whether it is with tasks, decisions, or emotional support. It validates them as a partner in your relationship. 10. Spontaneity & Passion - This encompasses unexpected gestures, adventurous activities, and expressing affection in a spontaneous manner. This can be large or small things. " It not just the thought that counts, its the actions. " I hope somehow this gives you some basic advice to bettering your relationships. Just remember that ALL CHANGE starts within yourself. We can never expect others to change if we are not wiling to do it ourselves. I hope you have a blessed week. Thanks! Check out our website for additional blogs and opportunities. www.for-the-father.com BE WELL...

Are you being intentional verses accidental in all areas of your life? Areas such as the Physical, Mental, and Spiritual parts of your daily life. In todays world, we are all bombarded with information about self-help and manifesting your destiny. Just so we are clear, that is not this. I just wanted to share something I learned on my journey to better myself in those (3) areas of life (Physical, Mental, and Spiritual). We are all human being and live on the same planet, so.... Anyway, on my journey have personally discovered how to be more intentional in all the different areas of my own life struggles. As my family portion of the target grows, I must be intentional more than ever. The ultimate goal is to always be intentional with others. As a leader, we all can get bogged down with outside influences and maybe it's because we don't take the time to truly understand ourselves in the three areas. Those areas of life are what we call the 5 Circles of Influence. The bullseye or center is self, then the next ring is family, next we have team, then we have organization, and lastly community. Some of these areas, you may be saying to yourself, are not applicable. Well sorry.... If you are a human being, they are. :) Use the following questions for yourself to see how you can move from self to community. How intentional are you... (1-100; 100 is highest)? As a person (human being) - meaning with yourself? Do you exercise? In what you eat? In what you watch? In what you listen to? Mentally? Do you try to increase your knowledge levels? Do you seek out information? Spiritually? No matter what you believe concerning God, you still have a spiritual side of your being. This is how you can have inner peace. How you interact with others? (Family, Team, Organization. Community) Are my relationships in tact? Do I need to reestablish boundaries in areas of my life or with certain individuals or groups? 2. Where can you trade up in mind, body, and spirit? What area could be stronger? 3. What areas (delights/desires) are consuming you right now and proving you to be unfruitful? 4. What do you want to see happen on this journey for Yourself? For your Family? For your Team? For your Organization? For your Community? Always Remember: Intentionality starts with you! So we need to identify any roadblocks in your life that are currently setting you back. Then we need to determine what needs to be pruned out of our life? Then finally, we must commit to what you want to be encouraged and accountable for, as you move forward. If you are interested in learning more, please book an online or phone conversation on my website - www.for-the-father.com I would love to visit and share with you more on this journey we call LIFE..... Be well....

Forgiveness deals with our emotional response toward an offender. Pardon deals with the consequences of the offense. Unless we have the authority we may not be able to pardon an offense, but we can always forgive. Forgiving a person is "clearing the record" with us and transferring the responsibility for any punishment to God. Forgiveness will make it possible for us to have the same openness towards the offender, after they offend us, as we had before they offended us. The following insights of scripture, assist us in looking at forgiveness from God's point of view: Forgiveness involves a positive attitude toward the offense rather than a negative attitude toward the offender. If our initial focus after being offended is on the offender, it is difficult not to become bitter. But if we first focus on the offense and forget for the moment who offended us, we are much better able to look at the offense as a significant aspect of our personal character development. Our proper attitudes as a result of the offense become the important concern. By using this approach, both the offender and the offense fade into insignificance and our response to the offense becomes the major concern. 2. Forgiveness views the offender as an "instrument" in God's hands. In the final analysis, it is God who uses even the "wrath of man to praise Him" Psalm 76:10 King David could have become very bitter toward the vile, hateful person who tried to humiliate him by publicly accusing him and cursing him. Instead, he viewed him simply as an agent of a higher power. He said, "The Lord hath bidden him (to curse me)." II Samuel 16:11 Jesus Christ could have become bitter toward those who beat Him and nailed Him to the cross, but He looked at them as carrying out the purpose of God for His life. Because of this, He was able to say, "Father, forgive them; for they know what they do." Luke 23:34 3. Forgiveness looks at the wounds of the offense as God's way of drawing attention to the offender's needs. When the girl possessed of the devil continually disrupted Paul's meetings, he could have become bitter at her disturbances. Her offenses toward his ministry, however, caused him to become keenly aware of her spiritual needs as a result he healed her. Acts 16:16-18 4. Forgiveness recognizes that bitterness is assuming a right we don't have. Only God has the right to punish. "Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord." Romans 12:19 A response of bitterness is an instinctive means of revenge toward the one who has offended us. Most of us are prone to use silence toward the offender as a means of punishing that person. (See also Romans 12:17-20) 5. Forgiveness realizes that the offender has already begun receiving the consequences of the offenses. A person's happiness is dependent upon his harmony with God and others. An offense toward us simply indicates that the offender is violating one or more principles and these violations will have a deep effect upon their own happiness and success. If anyone has wronged us, we can be sure that they are insensitive toward others around them and will suffer from conflicts with others as well. The reproofs of conscience, friends, circumstances, etc. are sufficient tools of God to emphasize to offenders. When they recognize the seriousness of the offense, they will not give us the privilege of helping them, if we have not reflected a loving spirit toward them through our attitudes. 6. Forgiveness involves cooperating with God in the offender's life. When someone intentionally offends us, we can be sure that they are going to be fully aware of our responses to them. In this case, we have a significant opportunity to demonstrate the potential forgiveness of God to them. As they see our openness and love toward them, they will be able to comprehend the same openness and love that God has towards them, in spite of their offenses toward God. When someone unintentionally offends us, it indicates that the offender has personal deficiencies, which they may not be aware of. In this case, our continued openness toward them may provide the opportunity to be of personal help to them in the areas revealed by the offense. The reward of meeting the needs will be a spirit of joy in us as we see them sharing with others the same attitudes they saw in us when we properly responded to the offenses. Forgiveness is having a greater concern for a person after they offend you than you did before they offended you. It is using the hurts of others as the basis of demonstrating Christ's love back to them.

"For the power of Man to make himself what he pleases means, as we have seen, the power of some men to make other men what they please." --C.S. Lewis, The Abolition of Man I believe that universal understandings of freedom and truth are "written on the human heart." America's founders also believed this to be true. In 1776, John Dickinson, one of the framers of our Constitution, affirmed: "Our liberties do not come from charters; for these are only the declaration of pre-existing rights. They do not depend on parchments or seals, but come from the King of Kings and the Lord of all the earth." The words of the Declaration of Independence speak of the "Laws of Nature and of Nature's God/Creator," and proceed to make the historic assertion: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness." Today, more than two centuries of the American experiment have passed. We tend to take these words for granted. But for the founding fathers, writing on the brink of armed revolution, these phrases were invested not just with their philosophy but with their lives. This is why they closed with a "firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence." The words of the Declaration of Independence illuminate the founding principles of the American Republic, principles explicitly grounded in unchanging truths about the human person. The principles of the Declaration were not fully reflected in the social or political structures of its own day. Then human slavery and other social injustices stood in tension to the high ideals the Founders articulated. Only after much time and effort have these contradictions been reduced. In a striking way, we see today a heightening of the tension between our nation's founding principles and political reality. We see this in diminishing respect for the inalienable right to life and in the elimination of legal protections for those who are most vulnerable. There can be no genuine justice in our society until the truths on which our nation was founded are more perfectly realized in our culture and in American law. One of those truths is our own essential creatureliness. Virtual reality and genetic science may give us the illusion of power, but we are not gods. We are not our own, or anyone else's, creator. Nor, for our own safety, should we ever seek to be. Even parents, entrusted with a special guardianship over new life, do not "own" their children any more than one adult can own another. And therein lies our only security. Only the Creator is the sovereign source and creator of basic human rights, starting with the right to life. We are daughters and sons of the one God who, outside and above us all, grants us the freedom, dignity, and rights of personhood which no one else can take away. Only in this context, the context of a Creator who authors our human dignity, do words like "truths" and "self-evident" find their ultimate meaning. Without the assumption that a Creator exists who has ordained certain irrevocable truths about the human person, no rights are "unalienable," and nothing about human dignity is axiomatic. This does not make America sectarian. It does, however, underline the crucial role God's sovereignty has played in the architecture of American politics. While the founders were a blend of Enlightenment rationalists and traditional Christians, generations of Jews, Muslims, and other religious groups, as well as non-believers, have all found a home in the United States. This is so because the tolerance of our system is rooted in the Jewish-Christian principle that even those who differ from one another in culture, appearance, and faith still share the same rights. We believe that this principle still possesses the power to enlighten our national will. In the Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World (Gaudium et Spes), it praises those women and men who have a vocation to public office. It encourages active citizenship. It also reminds us that, "The political community... exists for the common good: This is its full justification and meaning, and the source of its specific and basic right to exist. The common good embraces all those conditions of social life which enable individuals, families, and organizations to achieve complete and efficacious fulfillment" (74). In pursuing the common good, citizens should "cultivate a generous and loyal spirit of patriotism, but without narrow-mindedness... [they must also] be conscious of their specific and proper role in the political community: They should be a shining example by their sense of responsibility and their dedication to the common good..." (75). As to the role of the Church in this process: ". . . The political community and the Church are autonomous and independent of each other in their own fields. Nevertheless, both are devoted to the personal vocation of man, though under different titles . . . [yet] at all times and in all places, the Church should have the true freedom to teach the faith, to proclaim its teaching about society, to carry out its task among men without hindrance, and to pass moral judgment even in matters relating to politics, whenever the fundamental rights of man or the salvation of souls require it" (76; emphasis added). Pope John Paul II elaborates on this responsibility in his 1988 apostolic exhortation, The Vocation and the Mission of the Lay Faithful in the Church and in the World (Christifideles Laici): "The inviolability of the person, which is a reflection of the absolute inviolability of God, finds its primary and fundamental expression in the inviolability of human life. Above all, the common outcry, which is justly made on behalf of human rights -- for example, the right to health, to home, to work, to family, to culture -- is false and illusory if the right to life, the most basic and fundamental right and the condition of all other personal rights, is not defended with maximum determination... The human being is entitled to such rights in every phase of development, from conception until natural death, whether healthy or sick, whole or handicapped, rich or poor... [Moreover, if,] indeed, everyone has the mission and responsibility of acknowledging the personal dignity of every human being and of defending the right to life, some lay faithful are given title to this task: such as parents, teachers, health workers and the many who hold economic and political power" (38). I believe that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is the Gospel of Life. It invites all people and societies to a new life lived abundantly in respect for human dignity. I believe that this Gospel of Life is not only a complement to American political principles, but it is also the cure for the spiritual sickness now infecting our society. As Scripture says, "no house can stand divided against itself." (Luke 11:17) We cannot simultaneously commit ourselves to human rights and progress while eliminating or marginalizing the weakest among us. Nor can we practice the Gospel of Life only as a private piety. American Christians must live it vigorously and publicly, as a matter of national leadership and witness, or we will not live it at all.