THIS IS WHAT GOD WILL CONFRONT IN YOU THROUGH A KINGDOM SPOUSE IN YOUR MARRIAGE

A Kingdom spouse is not just about companionship, romance, or shared dreams, it’s about refinement.  When God sends you a partner aligned with His will, He doesn’t just give you someone to love; He gives you someone who will challenge everything in you that doesn’t look like Christ.

Marriage is not a hiding place for your flaws; it’s a mirror that magnifies them. A Kingdom spouse will expose what you have been able to cover up in friendships, ministry, or even casual dating.  Not because they are harsh or judgmental, but because their presence and your covenant will draw out what God wants to heal, prune, and transform.

Here are some things God will confront in you through a Kingdom spouse:

1.      SELFISHNESS – You can’t walk into a Kingdom marriage and live as though it’s still “me first”.  Philippians 2:3-4 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests of the others.”  God uses marriage to confront the part of you that still wants to cling to independence at the expense of unity.

2.      PRIDE – Your spouse will see you in your rawest state – your weaknesses, your fears, your failures.  Kingdom marriage will confront pride that makes you want to appear perfect.  James 4:6 reminds us – “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”  Through your spouse, God will teach you humility, vulnerability, and the grace of being known fully yet still loved.

3.      CONTROL – Many people enter relationships trying to steer everything according to their comfort and plan.  But a Kingdom spouse will test your willingness to release control to trust, to compromise, and most importantly, to yield to God’s authority over your union and play the role God gave you in your marriage.  Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, mind, and soul, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

4.      UNHEALED WOUNDS – The unresolved trauma, fears, and insecurities you buried will often surface in marriage.  Not to shame you, but to be healed.  God will use your spouse’s love, patience, and even conflicts to highlight where you still need His restoration.

5.      YOUR CAPACITY TO LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY – It’s easy to love when emotions are high and everything feels smooth.  But true Kingdom love requires patience, forgiveness, and sacrifice – especially when it’s inconvenient.  1 Corinthians 13:4-5 says, “Love is patient, love is kind… it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”

God doesn’t send a Kingdom spouse to leave you as you are.  He sends them to help you become who He intended.  That means the relationship will sometimes press on your weaknesses, stretch your faith, and confront your flesh to become the person God made you to be.

So, when you pray for a godly marriage or if you are in marriage now, don’t just pray for someone who completes you, pray for someone who sharpens you.  “Iron sharpens Iron”….  Because the true blessing of a Kingdom spouse isn’t just that they stand with you; it’s that God uses them to sanctify you.

Be Well...